For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
