at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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