I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Holy shit dude........stairs
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
