He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
