What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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