I'm going to jail i love you
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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