You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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