We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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