Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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