Will you blow on my dice?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize
