you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I lost the right to judge tonight
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
