i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
