Are we in a gay sports bar?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Randomize
