I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
