Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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