Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Randomize
