even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
