i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
as a side note pls kill me
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
