I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
