i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
