I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
