I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
