Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
so much tequila, so little girl.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
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