what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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