Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
