I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
