Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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