If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Girls should come with a carfax report
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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