What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Randomize
