I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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