too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
