As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
