Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
