Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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