I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
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