my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Randomize
