Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
