goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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