Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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