We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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