If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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