you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
