You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
