What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
