I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
