so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
