i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
