You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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