Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
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