I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
