If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
