On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
